Dating as a teenager was quite challenging because I wasn't properly taught about the complexities of relationships and how to navigate my emotions. While my mother and grandmother shared their advice on what I should and shouldn't do with boys, their attempts to guide me often felt restrictive. Despite their efforts, I longed to experience the romantic love I saw in movies, leading me to pursue that ideal and encounter many heartbreaks.
As an adult and a mother of four, I have gained a deeper understanding of the lessons I needed back then. Growing up in a broken home without my father present, I sought validation and love from boys to fill the void left by his absence and my mother's lack of nurturing. I associated my worth with being needed and sought acceptance from others to feel beautiful and loved. This pattern persisted until my thirties, as I settled for relationships that did not deserve my time and energy.
It took years of reflection and tears to evolve into the woman I am today. Looking back, I realize that self-love is everything! I wish I had known earlier to cherish myself above all, reminding myself daily of my uniqueness and worth. Understanding that not everyone will see me as a shining star was a crucial lesson and taught me to value healthy connections over mere companionship. Healing from past traumas and setting high standards for my partner became non-negotiable, as I refused to settle for anything less than I deserved.
I wish I had understood sooner that I deserve the world and that true fulfillment comes from loving myself first. Recognizing my beauty, worth, and strength has empowered me to never settle for less than I deserve. And I want you to know that you deserve the same. Prioritize self-love, affirm your beauty and worth daily, and remember that settling for anything less than you deserve is never an option. Embrace your uniqueness, celebrate your strengths, and always choose yourself first!
